Many gay men never thought they would see the day they could marry and have children. Gays With Kids writer David Toussaint tells the story of some who also never thought they would end up divorced raising kids alone.
With gay marriage and partnerships, it was inevitable that gay break-ups would soon occur. It was also inevitable that many of these dissolutions would involve children. Gay men are discovering a new situation, one that has plagued our heterosexual counterparts for ages: raising kids alone. Here we talk with three men who are raising children alone or mostly alone, and who never intended that to be the scenario when they had children. Sound familiar? It’s like half of our parents.
Richard, 50, is a New York freelance photographer who is raising a seven-year-old girl without his ex-partner. The couple adopted the child before gay marriage was legal in New York, but they were registered as domestic partners. Richard’s ex-partner developed a severe drug addiction and the relationship ended. After his ex gave up his legal rights, Richard obtained sole custody of the child.
“It’s not what I expected ten years ago,” he says. “We did everything right; the house in the country, the apartment in the city, the child. I had no idea that my ex had any addictions when we moved in together. He became terrifying and it had to end. And I had to take my girl.”
Richard still has the home and the same apartment, but his life as a parent has changed drastically. “I do everything myself, and I have a high-stress job. I am often shooting from four in the morning till midnight, and there used to be someone else to take care of her when I was busy.”
Read More at the Good Men Project
No comments:
Post a Comment